Some possible conclusions from watching father:
The next influence we must look at ie that of father. Do remember however, that
the father is not "creating these conclusions".
The child is. The child looks at all of his perceived life circumstances and creates a "Life Plan" in response to them from his own creativity!
Here in Adler's own words is a summation:
A summary Of Adler’s notions by Adler(1)
1. In the concept of "life" the organic and psychological mode has been preformed. It encounters us everywhere as the "compulsion for setting goals." This is because life demands that we act. It is in this way that the ultimate character of the inner life is fixed.
2. Human beings are endowed with an incessant stimulus to strive for goals because of a feeling of inadequacy. What we call "drives" is the established path that is oriented by the goal. Will power accrues in spite of apparent contradictions in order to forge toward this integrated goal,
3. Just as an insufficient organ creates an unbearable situation out of which grow numerous attempts at compensation until the organism feels itself equal to the demands, so does the child's psyche out of a feeling of insecurity seeks that font of extra strength to rise above that feeling of insecurity.
4. The study of the human psyche first of all must take into consideration these tentative efforts and exertions of strength that grew out of the individual's actual physical state, and that reflect practiced and accomplished ways of dealing with life.
5. For this reason every manifestation of an individual's psyche can therefore be seen only as one aspect of an integrated life plan. All attempts that fail to explain a psychological phenomenon along these lines and that try to understand a child's psyche solely through an analysis of that phenomenon, not seeing it in its whole context, must, therefore, be regarded as unsuccessful. What actually happens in a child's life should never be regarded as complete in itself but, if observed with a goal in mind, should be seen only as preparatory for moving toward that goal.
6. In accordance with this concept nothing can occur without a purpose. We shall attempt in the following to highlight the most important guiding principles:
Reality
a. Developing abilities to gain superiority
b. Measuring up to one's environment
c. Gathering knowledge and skills
d. Awareness of the existence of hostility
e. Utilizing love and obedience, hate and defiance, social feeling and striving for power to attain superiority.
Imagination
f. Developing "as-if reasoning abilities (fantasy and symbolic successes)
g. Exploiting weakness
h. Procrastinating decision-making, search for cover
7. An essential precondition for these guidelines is finding a lofty goal, an omnipotence and god-likeness that must remain in the unconscious in order to be effective. As soon as the purpose and meaning of this goal and its contrariness to the truth has been fully comprehended and understood, the individual no longer is its captive and will be able to invalidate its automatic, stereotypical influence with an intelligent approach to practical social needs. This goal, shaped in accordance with an individual's constitution and experience, is variously concretely covered and can, in that form, rise regularly into consciousness as psychosis. The unawareness of this goal for power is conditioned by its unbridgeable contradiction to real social feeling. Gaining insight, without astute penetration, and given a general human obsessiveness with striving for power can hardly be expected without outside professional help.
8. The normal veiling of the striving for power, which when necessary can manifest itself in other, often seemingly contrary forms, can be presented schematically as a juxtaposing of "male and female," "below and above," "everything and nothing" which portends to be the sum of all power in which the child seeks to be a participant. In the inherent contrast, usually the weaker is regarded as the hostile element and as such is to be subdued.
9. All these symptoms become very prominent in the neurotic because, up to a certain point, the patient with his combative attitude and his unique apperception scheme has indicated refusal to undergo any extensive revision of his childish misjudgments. Furthermore, he is assisted in defending this position by a solipsistic attitude that consequently has become fixed.
10. We should, therefore, not be surprised to learn that every neurotic behaves as if he must constantly prove his superiority, including over women.
(1) CCWAA Volume 4, pages 48 -51
With the above solidly in view, let us look at a few scenarios.
Suppose the father is very domineering. What may the child conclude? He may conclude that is the way men are and adopt a domineering attitude toward society. He might, on the other hand, conclude that the world is a place where one must keep one's head down because you can not overcome the "big people".
Suppose father is weak and ineffective and allows mother to totally dominate the home. The child may conclude that he is like dad and must therefore allow others to do whatever they will. But then again, he may decide to become the absolute opposite of father and develop a totally domineering attitude toward family and even the world in general.
Suppose father complains all the time about his mother or the children This child may conclude that he is flawed that he can do nothing right and give up on living. He might "make the flight to illness" and seek safety in emotional unwellness that he creates, but then again he may come on-side with father and constantly find fault with those with whom he is close, or once more with all of mankind!
As I pointed out under the influence of the mother,
the constructions are almost always antithetical. This is so much the case that it becomes one of the hall marks of the neurosis!
So in Adler's psychology, it is never (well seldom) what has happened to a person, or what he has witnessed that creates the Life Style, but rather his own unique creativity. It is from this unique creativity that the unity of the life style unfolds. It is unitary in its direction based on childhood protypes and conclusions and created by the individual although the organic part of each individual will play a role in which direction he may choose.
Once more, there are no cookbook answers. We must look at each INDIVIDUAL in his uniqueness and discern the direction of his striving from the Inferiority Feeling toward the self created goal of Fictional Superiority.
This is a line that will run consistently through everything he does, says, wears, notices and how he reacts. Once this unifying principle is comprehended for any individual, then his movements start to make sense in the symphony of his life. 