Thanks for the reply Lindsay.

Male half responding:

As to admission, I admitted nothing to the police other than participating in adult porn groups such as MSN groups and yahoo groups, and having sent photos. I never outright admitted to looking for or participating in groups for seeing pictures of girls younger than 18.
As to adimitting things to my wife and the doctor who gave me the eval. I think it was best to "come clean".
Again, legally I have not admitted to anything... I could take this to jury and perhaps if i was not in such a heavily right wing mega-baptist region, I could probably win, but I served on a jury and believe me 80+% of jurors do not hold the concept of "beyond a reasonable doubt"
(Ironicly, I say the above being both right-wing AND Baptist)

I could, but don't wish to go into how todays world regards younger teens in terms if sexuality.

The point really is, that I did look at porn and chat with women without my wifes knowledge, or consent. She feels cheated and IMO rightfully so. Soooo... im trying to find resources to heal us both from this.

Another Irony is that I really can't stand to be in contact with children, they have always....."freaked me out" even when I myself was a child (I was the only child living in the household at the time). My wife and I fought for years about having kids.
Now though, my son is my world, I love him like nothing ever before, and my feelings amaze me. Even with him in my life, I still feel compelled to stay away from kids because to be quite frank........ they annoy the shit out of me.