It's easy to imagine being upset and even sad in your situation, SWS.

It seems there are several different kinds of conversations you might have with your psychiatrist. I'd wager you'd do better simply talking about how *you* feel emotionally, and about your fantasies about what she's thinking, doing, meaning by her behavior, etc. If on the other hand you ask her to explain herself, to provide a good reason, etc., you'll have a whole different (and maybe less satisfying) conversation and result. If you can muster it, I'd suggest the former approach ... and if not, then perhaps talk about how you are in an unspecified situation where you need to speak up but can't.

Perhaps with some exploration you can find out what has silenced you here, and perhaps elsewhere. And if you can't do either, I'd suggest you consider switching therapists.

By the way, while it doesn't apply to psychiatrists who have their own code, the NASW Code of Ethics talks about the duty of loyalty to clients ... whatever the wording of each code, that's a reasonable expectation for you to have. So maybe she's been really sick, but leaving you in the dark and uncertain is not necessary, in my book.

Good luck!