Judy,

I found your whole message very interesting. Your closing question is obviously a very important -- and challenging -- one. In fact it is the topic of an entire book that I am working on, so boiling it down isn't easy. About all I can say in a few words is that for me the integrating concepts are, first of all (no surprise) the vicious circle concept that has been at the heart of the cyclical psychodyamic vision from the beginning, and second an emphasis on contextualism, which enables both the integration of different views and, important to me, a sorting out of those "relational" approaches which are, in certain respects, perhaps not as relational as they first seem from those which are more thoroughgoingly relational.

I wish i could answer your important question more adequately here, but I think I am too immersed in the overall structure of the book at the moment to disembed enough to say it well more briefly.

Paul