I think your post explains perfectly why EMDR should not be done on anyone with a dissociative disorder unless that therapist is trained to work with dissociative disorders. These are the kinds of snarls that typically happen.

Having said that, I'm going to make some general comments that generally apply to anyone with a dissociative disorder -- but may not specifically apply to you, since I don't know your whole story.

What you are describing is exactly the problem -- or one illustration of it --- namely that parts of the self react and are not on board with the treatment. Therefore, the EMDR cannot complete normally, and it can be anywhere from disturbing afterwards to extremely destabilizing.

When EMDR goes well with non-DD people it is because the various parts of the self (which aren't as distinct, mind you) all chime in in their turns and process their piece. When it goes badly with DD people it is because parts get mad or upset and don't let the work continue. Very often it is because a protector part doesn't want a little part to go through pain. Good judgment on their part. Sometimes the protector has the therapist confused with the perpetrator. Yikes.

There are ways to strengthen littles, engage angry protectors, get blocking perp introjects (internal holographic likenesses of perpetrators) to be oriented to the fact they are in the same body as the littles and the front parts, and its now 2007, and one is in THIS city instead of where it happened (if that's true). There are other ways to give a voice to the various internal concerns and get the team to function like a team, BEFORE doing EMDR.

In short, the therapist has to be trained to do the necessary preparation and debug any blockages that come up, using ego state therapy.

Yes, those experiences need to be articulated outloud. The instructions say to tell the therapist as accurately as possible what is going on inside, without judgment of whether it should be happening. It's a good instruction.

There are lots of great and experienced EMDR practitioners, consultants and even facilitators who are NOT trained and experienced with dissociative disorders, or who have had one or two encouraging experiences but haven't learned the protocol for how to do EMDR with a DD client. No client of any therapy has to do anything they don't want to do in their therapy. Trauma clients have typically had more than enough of that, I mean, feeling coerced to comply in silence.

Lots of times clients think they can't speak up because their therapist is an expert and is an authority and they want them to like them. But therapists can't do their job if they don't know what's going on. Unlike with childhood trauma, where one had to keep secrets or no one wanted to hear, therapists typically do want to hear, and so it is helpful when adult parts remember its a different time and one can now speak their truth.

So I don't know if any of the above applies in your case, though it applies in many cases. I don't know your therapist either or whether he is trained (I mean TRAINED) in dissociative disorders or not, but it is always a fair question for a client to ask these things. And remember also, even consulting EMDR practitioners need to get consultation at times on things. I have a consultant -- two really -- I work with on specific matters. We can't all know everything, can we?

So as I often encourage people here, if you print this off and take it to your therapist, who no doubts wants the best for you, it may help open up discussion both within you and between you and your therapist.

Sandra Paulsen PhD
EMDR Institute facilitator
EMDRIA approved consultant and
advanced specialty workshop instructor on DD
Bainbridge Island WA